New Jersey La Leche League Conference 2009: To Listen But Not To Eat...

Ina May Gaskin...recounting "Little-known facts about breastfeeding"
at the NJ area LLL conference, April 25, 2009

Attending La Leche League conferences is always a joy. It is heartwarming to be surrounded by such a large group of like-minded mothers, women devoted to nurturing their children and to helping others do the same. The conferences are also a great opportunity to hear the voices of wisdom speak and this year was a stellar one in that respect. Marian Tompson (one of the founding mothers of LLL) and Ina May Gaskin (a midwifery guru) were both on hand to share their latest ponderings with us.

This year, as in years past, Izzy has joined me at the conference, playing in the children's activity room while I "go to Mama school". I don't ordinarily choose to sleep over because I would rather not subject myself to a freezing cold impersonal hotel with less than mediocre food. I opted to stay over for one night this year because our group won the privilege of having breakfast with Ina May Gaskin and Marian Thompson. I couldn't pass up the opportunity so on Friday evening, we drove down with M. and her family. I packed a picnic dinner for us, along with loads of snacks.

We arrived at dinnertime and Izzy and were able to partake of the crudites offered at the hotel, which we supplemented with our truffled chicken sandwich. The food only deteriorated from there, as the next morning I paid around $25 for a bagel, some sliced fruit, a glass of orange juice and a cup of tea. Lunch was not much better. Izzy had spaghetti with tomato sauce (I wouldn't allow the meatballs) and I had some vegetarian dish with vegetables, pasta and cheese.

This year, as in every other year at the conference, I lamented the food served. Some years I have even opted out of lunch. I chose not to go that route this year since not having a seat with the others is less than convivial. So it was that Izzy and I sat eating the unappealing offerings, listening while other moms complained about them too. Granted we are there to listen and learn and not to eat but even so, why does the hotel food have to be so abysmal?

Scorpions For Snack?: Now These Are My People

Matthew Forney, in his fabulous piece in today's Food Section of the New York Times describes how he and his wife have raised their children to eat everything.  As Americans growing up in Beijing they have had access to an array of exotic foods that boggle the imagination.  From deep-fried scorpions to Tibetan Yak jerky, they eat it all.  Forney and his wife offer superlative advice for raising adventurous eaters.

1.  Breastfeeding is the best way to prepare children for a life of good eating.  "Our kids started off right because she breast-fed them, which "opened their taste buds."  He says he is not sure if this is scientific but I will let him know.  It is.

2. Children will not starve themselves.  If they know they have no choice they will eat what you give them... eventually. "People learn to eat what is available or they starve. Fussiness never enters the picture."

3. Parents and peers are great role models. "My wife who is Italian, makes sure olives and strong cheese reach our table every day, even in China."

4. If you don't keep it in your house, it won't be an option. "Roy and Alice (his children) never faced the snare of microwave pizzas, Cheez Whiz or spaghetti from a can.

Now if only I could get them to come visit and share some those scorpions with Izzy!

Don't Blame Them: Children Are Beautiful No Matter What They Eat

In a recent post, a reader chides me for my supposed disregard for children who are victims of natural disasters or those raised in poverty. In response...

Dear Ms."Wonder Why You Keep Reading",

On a daily basis, we are bombarded with heartbreaking news the world over. From children of famine to disaster victims deprived of proper food. No question that hearing about these hideous circumstances causes us all to pause and to be ever thankful for what we do have and to help in our own ways.

Heartwarming stories which emerge from these sad times also help us process the horrors. One such story was highlighted in today's news. It is the tale of an heroic Chinese woman. She breastfed nine children (not her own) as she led them from the disaster. She herself did not consider the act to be noteworthy, yet she gave those children a gift. She offered them the perfect food, to help them through this crisis . This story comes to mind because the way we think about feeding our children begins there. Many Americans might be surprised at what she did or find it unimaginable. I would have done what she did in an instant.

Breast milk is the first, ideal food for human infants. The sad fact is that most American women do not breastfeed their babies beyond six months of age. Some don't even give breastfeeding a chance at all. Instead they turn to industrially produced formula. When it is time for solid foods and snacks they give their children processed puffs and jarred baby foods.

How and why parents choose to feed their delightful, intelligent children in this way pains me. Of course the children eating goldfish are beautiful as are those drinking from a bottle. Have I ever suggested otherwise? You are missing the point completely if you think I look askance at these children. I adore children and only wish that what they ate matched their beauty. For there can be so much wonder and excitement to be found in nourishing foods.

Why in our land of plenty do so many parents continue to feed their babies formula and their children junk food on a regular basis? There are numerous reasons, stemming from government subsidies, big business marketing strategies and a myriad of other causes too lengthy to go into (see Michael Pollan's, In Defense of Food) in this post. Suffice it to say that many parents are simply misguided.

Food prices are continually on the rise and in other countries staple items such as rice are becoming prohibitively expensive. What is truly shocking (aside from the "horror" you find in my blog) is that Americans waste a pound of food per person daily. The way we choose to feed our families and children can help us all play a role in reducing that number.

For starters, teach your children to revere what they eat. To be thankful for wholesome foods instead of mindless snacks. To appreciate the beauty of a fresh carrot, a ripe peach, a homemade loaf of bread. Let them see the time and energy it takes to prepare a homemade meal rather than one that came from a box, jar or fast food restaurant. Help your children understand where their food comes from. Most importantly, teach them to make wise food choices.

My hero Alice Waters has been working diligently to change the way school children think about food. She so eloquently makes a case for teaching children to respect themselves through what they eat. She raised her daughter Fanny, while working at her renowned restaurant Chez Panisse. Given that Alice travels with her own olive oil, I can easily surmise that goldfish rarely, if ever, passed her daughter's lips. I strive to do the same for Izzy.

Izzy's Mama

A Rare Afternoon Without Izzy: The Business Of Being Born

Izzy was off frolicking with his Papa while I went to see a local screening of Ricki Lake's compelling new documentary film, "The Business of Being Born." Her personal experiences with a hospital birth and then a home birth were the impetus for her to produce this important work. She wanted to explore the birth options women have and expose the sad state of birth in the United States.



What, you ask, does this have to do with Izzy eating? Well watching it reminded me of how one's birth experience can directly impact an infant's ability to breastfeed. Breastfeeding may not be easy at first as a result of certain birth experiences but I encourage mothers to persist in their attempts. Breast milk is nature's perfect food and should be considered as the best option whenever possible.

In the same way that many women can't conceive of the idea of natural childbirth, they also may not consider breastfeeding. Our culture is duped into believing that hospital births and formula are what's best for babies, when nothing could be further from the truth.

Breastfeeding is ideal for all babies. Aside from the bonding aspect and the well-known health benefits for both mother and child, babies who are breastfed are being exposed to more flavors than those who are formula fed. The taste and consistency of breast milk vary, depending upon what the mother has eaten. Formula, on the other hand, is one dimensional, never wavering in flavor or consistency. Breast milk is the clear winner when it comes to shaping a child's palate. If you eat garlic, the baby tastes it. If you have fish, they taste that too. What better way to expose those young tastebuds to deliciousness?

The movie brought back memories of nursing newborn Izzy, knowing that despite the pain, I was giving him the best food on earth. I had a very difficult time with breastfeeding but I was determined to make it work. Feeding was my greatest expression of love and still is, as I strive to ccok and provide Izzy with healthy, good-tasting foods.

Good Taste, It Starts Early...From Pregnancy To Starting Solids

If you read my blog, you know that I revel in the fact that my son eats most everything. It is my belief that this did not happen by accident. There are many things a parent can do to help their children eat well. Current research is only beginning to support this and I hope to see further related studies.

As I have noted before, the French have already conducted research with breastfeeding mothers, showing a correlation between what they ate and their babies' preferences. The mothers who were given an anise-flavored beverage had babies who preferred this flavor. This comes as no surprise since breast milk varies in flavor, depending upon the mother's diet.

More recent research seems to indicate that a mother's diet while pregnant may also influence the child's tastes later on. I know that many have anecdotal evidence which doesn't support this theory. They claim to have children who dislike the foods they ate during pregnancy. I would love to delve a bit further into their claims.

Although I do believe that what a mother eats during pregnancy and while nursing can have a profound effect on a child's tastes, I think that shaping the palate requires more than that. It is the introduction of that food when the baby begins eating solids, which helps cement the child's relationship to it.

Often mothers will introduce a food and find that baby is not interested in it. They may try a few times and give up. Many mothers don't realize that it may take at least 12 exposures to a food before a baby is interested in eating it.

A few things to keep in mind when starting solids:

1. Start slowly: Introduce new foods one at a time. Continue to offer that food for about three days.

2. Make your own baby food if possible: It is truly more appealing that what you will find in a jar and it really helps prime your child's palate for clear, healthy flavors.

3. Be persistent: If your baby doesn't seem to like a food after a few days, give it a rest. Then reintroduce it in a few weeks, alongside something she does eat. If you are nursing, be sure to eat the food the day before offering it.

4. Eat when your baby eats. Babies are social eaters and will be more inclined to eat if they see you enjoying food.

5. Take a lighthearted approach to mealtime. Food should have positive and fun associations. Children should look forward to eating.

There are many more ways you can encourage your children to have a positive relationship with food. Sprinkled throughout this blog are ideas to help you get started. After all, eating is one of life's greatest pleasures and hopefully it will be for your children too!